I've had a lot of ups and downs lately. I lost confidence in myself and my job for a good while. I feel that my company doesn't trust me as a teacher yet. Although I know I have a lot to learn and they're trying to help me, I feel that it's not being done in a constructive way (they have a pretty skewed ideas on constructive criticism and professionalism in general). But I have to remember that most of my students really like me and feel that they've learned a lot from me. I just had a couple of bad experiences, which I suppose is normal for most new teachers.
To add to my frustration (or maybe as a result of it), I became really homesick. I am sad that I missed my old roommates Jereme and Amy get hitched, and I may miss my dear friend Carisa's wedding in October (although I'm looking at ticket prices taking donations). At the same time as I started to get frustrated with my job and got terribly homesick, I happened to come across an amazing job opportunity in Portland at a company that I've been drooling over for years. They seemed really interested in me and my experience, and I corresponded with the HR person for about to weeks. In the end, the company decided to hold off on hiring for a few months. So I'm not moving home quite yet, but talking to this company (which deals in import/apparel production/all the things I like), made me realize that the apparel trade world is really where I want to be. It will be harder than I previously thought to pursue that avenue here, so if I want to carry on with that, I'll have to move back to the States. But I'll be saving that for later.
So for now, I want to see this whole teaching thing through. I signed a year contract, and I want to reach the end of it. I have turned my attitude around and am improving my teaching skills by leaps and bounds. I am once again happy to be doing this and appreciate the experience. I also have a lot more to see here in East Asia. I haven't been to Southern Taiwan yet! or Japan! or Korea! or the million other places that are just a short plane or boat ride away.
PS: Check my photo page for new additions.....
2 comments:
Hey there, Ms. V.
We missed you two too. :( I was just talking to Gretchen about growing fennel so that we can make yummy fennel minestrone again. And that got me thinking about how long ago that seems when we were all together. I'm sorry about the jerky criticism affecting your self esteem. Boo on them. It's all new and that's always hard for everyone. But how awesome that you are figuring out some things and what you want to do. Be kind to yourself!
http://www.photoworks.com/members/sharedBook.jsp?prID=22431251&key=Jeramy_Wedding
(I think you need safari)
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